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  • Текст песни Chris Rock - No Sex (in the Champagne Room)



    Ladies and Gentlemen of the GED class of 1999
    I have one piece of advice for you
    No matter what a stripper tells you...
    There is NO SEX in the champagne room
    NONE!


    Oh, there's CHAMPAGNE in the champagne room
    But you don't want champagne...
    You want SEX!
    And there's NO SEX in the champagne room


    Don't go to parties with metal detectors
    Sure, it feels safe inside...
    But what about all those niggas waitin' outside with guns?...
    They know you ain't got one!


    If a woman tells you she's 20, and looks 16 - she's 12
    If she tells you she's 26 and LOOKS 26 - she's damn near 40!


    Take off that silly-ass hat!


    The ODB couldn't have possibly committed all those crimes...
    Coolio did some of dat shit!


    Young, black men: If you go to a movie theater
    and someone steps on your foot...
    LET IT SLIIIIDE...
    Why spend the next 20 years in jail
    Cuz someone smudged your PUMA?


    CORNBREAD...
    Ain't nuttin' wrong wit that!


    No matter what you think of what I'm sayin'
    Remember this one thing...
    There is NO SEX in the champagne room


    (Ohh...no sex in the champagne room (x6)
    There's absolutely, positively no sex in the champagne room
    no..no...)


    If a homeless person has a funny sign
    He hasn't been homeless that long
    A REAL homeless person is too HUNGRY to be funny


    If a girl has a pierced tongue,
    She'll probably suck your DICK
    If a guy has a pierced tongue,
    He'll probably suck your DICK


    Here's a HORRORscope for everyone:
    Aquarius - YOU'RE GONNA DIE
    Capricorn - YOU'RE GONNA DIE
    Gemini - YOU'RE GONNA DIE TWICE!
    Leo - YOU'RE GONNA DIE
    Scorpio - YOU'RE GONNA DIE FUCKIN'!


    No one goes to Hooters for wings


    If you've been dating a man for 4 months
    And you haven't met any of his friends...
    You are NOT his girlfriend!


    Some of the things I said may not apply to you
    Some of the things I said may offend you
    But no matter who you are,
    You MUST REMEMBER this ONE thing:
    No matter what a stripper says...
    there is NO SEX in the champagne room
    NONE!


    (No sex in the champagne room
    I said no sex in the champagne room
    No sex in the champagne room
    No no sex in the champagne room
    No sex in the champagne room
    Ain't gettin' none, can't have none..noo...
    In the champagne room......ahh ahh.....
    There's absolutely positively no sex in the champagne room
    Say noo..noo... say nooooo..... there ain't no sex....
    In the champagne room
    noo..no....)