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  • Текст песни Kip Addotta - Wet Dream



    It was April the 41st, being a quadruple leap year
    I was driving in downtown Atlantis
    My Barracuda was in the shop, so I was in a rented Stingray, and it was
    overheating
    So I pulled into a Shell station
    They said I'd blown a seal
    I said, "Fix the damn thing and leave my private life out of it, okay
    pal?"

    While they were doing that I walked over to a place called the oyster
    bar -- a real dive
    But I knew the owner, he used to play for the Dolphins
    I said, "Hi, Gil!!!"
    You hafta yell, he's hard of herring

    CHORUS:
    Think I had a wet dream
    Cruisin' through the Gulf Stream
    Oooh-ooh-ooh-ooh
    Wet dream...

    Gil was also down on his luck
    Fact is, he was barely keeping his head below water
    I gullied up to the sandbar
    He poured the usual
    Rusty snail, hold the grunion, shaken, not stirred
    With a peanut butter and jellyfish sandwich on the side -- heavy on the
    mako
    I slipped him a fin -- on porpoise
    I was feeling good
    I even dropped a sand dollar in the box for Jerry's Squids -- for the
    halibut

    Well, the place was crowded
    We were packed in like sardines
    They were all there to listen to the big band sounds of Tommy Dorsal --
    what sole
    Tommy was rockin' the place with a very popular tuna -- "Salmon Chanted
    Evening"
    And the stage was surrounded by screaming groupers
    Probably there to see the bass player

    One of them was this cute little yellowtail
    And she's giving ME the eye
    So I figure, this is my chance for a little fun
    You know -- a piece of Pisces

    But she said things I just couldn't fathom
    She was too deep, and seemed to be under a lot of pressure
    Boy, could she drink
    She drank like a... she drank A LOT...
    I said, "What's your sign?"
    She said, "Aquarium"
    I said, "GREAT!!! Let's get tanked!"

    CHORUS

    I invited her up to my place for a little midnight bait
    I said, "C'mon baby, it'll only take a few minnows"
    She threw me that same old line
    "Not tonight -- I got a haddock"

    And she wasn't kiddin' either, 'cuz in came the biggest, meanest looking
    haddock I'd ever seen come down the pike
    He was covered with mussels
    He came over to me, he said, "Listen shrimp -- don't you come trolling
    around here"
    What a crab
    This guy was steamed -- I could see the anchor in his eyes

    I turned to him, I said, "Abalone -- You're just being shellfish"
    Well, I knew it was going to be trouble, and so did Gil, 'cuz he was
    already on the phone to the cods
    The haddock hits me with a sucker punch
    I catch him with a left hook
    He eels over
    It was a fluke, but there he was, lying on the deck, flat as a mackerel
    Kelpless

    I said, "Forget the cods, Gil, this guy's gonna need a sturgeon"
    Well, the yellowtail was impressed with the way I landed her boyfriend
    She came over to me, she said, "Hey big boy, you're really a game fish"
    "What's your name?"
    I said, "Marlin"

    CHORUS

    Well from then on, we had a whale of a time
    I took her to dinner
    I took her to dance
    I bought her a bouquet of flounders
    And then I went home with her
    And what did I get for my trouble?
    A case of the clams

    CHORUS
    CHORUS/FADE